Let’s Talk Sex the Curvy Way

Ever read the sex tips in Cosmo & thought “seriously, I’m not a yoga master, how the hell am I supposed to do that position” or thought “wow, are the only people who have experimental sex skinny?” I know I’ve certainly scoffed at sex position cards that suggested aerobics that would qualify me for the Olympics!

It’s really sad when you look up “fat sex how to” or “bbw sex guide” it only takes about 5 entries before you get to either degrading porn or weight loss tips. Ugh. And then, of course, there’s all the body-negative bullshit to wade through. Way to remove sexual agency from plus sizes!

Being plus-sized has hindered many ladies from enjoying sex as they want to. They usually stick with a particular sex style; often the missionary style while having sex especially with a partner “smaller” than them. Many women on the big side say that they don’t always enjoy sex with men on the slimmer side because they feel embarrassed and self-conscious during the act.

They may also worry about how their size may be in the way of going versatile in bed, like trying other sex positions like the cowgirl, doggie etc. – they often feel their weight could crush the guy or their voluptuous ass would get in the way of penetration which is often a misconception.

Well, plus-sizes have sex too. Below are some tips & tricks to explore sex whether you’re plus-sized, chubby, or thick.

#1. Get comfortable with yourself: Most big women often feel so insecure about being naked with another person, no matter how often they’ve been told how beautiful or how awesome their body is and so, this may cause them to warp their body in a particular way on the bed as if they would somehow appear slimmer, cover their body with duvet or refuse to do positions that would make them look fatter. All those things may make you feel more at ease but it may also suck the fun out of sex. The process becomes tedious, makes you feel at ease but definitely not any sexier or desirable and it may put your partner off more than you think. To enjoy sex, you have to understand that you are sexy as you are and although it may be hard to believe, your partners actually have sex with you because of the way your body looks and not out of pity; a lot of men love them big. So, love your body and embrace the sexiness it oozes.

#2. Setting the Mood Right: Now that you’ve embraced your sexiness, you just have to always have the right sexual environment. Get firm pillows; good firm pillows should be every big girl’s paddy during sex. Get water-based lubricants and a nice springy surface to do it on; surfaces (beds) that will have you bouncing back up rather than sinking in. Once you do all these, you are on your way to having a wonderful sexperience with your partner. All you need now is to try out those sex positions you are afraid to try. These are some of the best sex positions for plus-sized beauties:

The Missionary Style: this is one of the most laid back sex positions and could be a fun way to have sex. It’s as simple as just lying on your back with your partner on top, yet, it can be a challenge depending on the difference between you and your partner especially for women with bulging tummies and really thick thighs. However, this doesn’t stop you from having the best missionary sex of your life. Get your firm pillows out and put them under your back or right under your butt. Draw your knees up and pull your thighs towards your chest. This opens up your vagina for deep penetration and gives your partner room for ideal thrusting since your thighs and tummy are out of the way. You can stimulate yourself by putting up a show he might enjoy or reach around to caress his testis. Maintaining eye contact with your partner also intensifies the sexperience.

Missionary Position

Cowgirl/Cowgirl Reverse: when you’re on top, it gives you even more room for deeper penetration and never ever think you’re going to crush your partner or suffocate them; you just have to know how to make it really work. Put a pillow under your partner’s butt to elevate him higher and that makes him easier to get down on “it”. As you go up and down, evenly distribute your weight by planting your hands firmly on the bed instead of sitting straight up; it gives you lots of control. And when you get tired while humping him (this happens even with slimmer women so don’t be afraid), let your partner hold you still and then do the thrusting from below which can help you maximize your time on top. You can also ask him to sit at the end of the bed, near the bedhead. This will allow you hold on to the bedhead for support. Straddle him and this way, you can both be able to support your weight. Once you get really comfortable and figure out how easy it is to be on top; you can use the momentum and sheer force of your big ass to thrust down on your partner, you will always want to be on top.

Cowgirl Reverse Position

The “Doggie” Style: the doggie style is one the best sex positions for big people as the tummy is out of the way and it gives the partner enough room to work with but if you have really big ass, you may have a bit of challenge with this style. Rather than be on all fours, place your head lower than your ass or place a pillow under your belly. This way it pushes your butt up, opens your vagina and creates more room for deeper penetration. It’s also super comfortable since it’s not as tiring.

Doggie Position

No matter how heavy you look or feel, you can have memorable, mind blowing sex.  And it can be as varied and exciting as it is for everyone else.

— SEX is not only the basis of life, It is the Reason for Life. Life is too short to have bad sex! —